I am Thankful!

1. For what Jesus did on the cross....Thank You Jesus for taking my place and giving me such an amazing gift!

2. For my husband....Thank you for loving me. You are my best friend and I love you!

3. For my boys....You are what made my life have meaning. I am so proud to be your mom.

4. For my girls...A, M and S....the daughters I always prayed for. I am so thankful to have you in my life (for a lot more reasons than just helping to make things a little more even between the guys and girls!) I am proud of all of you!

5. For my grandchildren....C, E, S, A, KS, T, C, J, JJ, L and A.....you are my heart. You are laughter, fun, joy and sometimes even a chance for a "do over"! I love you!!!

6. For my old friends. Wow. The meaning of friends and friendship has really come into focus this year. You know who you are and what you've done to get me through this past year. For all of you I am truly thankful!

7. For my new friends...loving getting to know you!

8. For my extended family....we don't see each other often....talk as much as we should...but I am thankful for you and love you very much.

I don't think I've shared yet that.....

I love NASCAR.  Have loved it for years.  Picked my guy....Casey Mears...and cheered for him up until this year when it was obvious that he probably wouldn't have a regular ride.  But....if you ever get a steady ride, Casey....I'll be here for you!

So this year I've been cheering for Carl Edwards, mostly.  And he's won the last two races.  Today was the very last race of the season and he won...but his win was overshadowed by JJ winning the championship for the 5th year in a row.  But emphasis on the last race.  I hate that there aren't any more races till February.  Boo Hoo. 

So here's a note to all you Sprint Cup Nascar drivers.....I need a guy to cheer for.  I need one of you to step up next season and really get me excited about cheering for you.  It  may still be Carl....or Tony....or Junior....I promise I will stick with you for the whole season....but guys...we have to agree that JJ has to be dethroned...it's getting boring. 

Just letting you know, Nascar.

My Grandson's 14th Birthday

Today is C's birthday.  He turned 14.  I know, I know, we all say, "where did the time go?"  But really....how is it he's 14?  I became a Nana at the age of 40.  The first one in my peer group.  The circumstances of his birth were that his parents were unmarried and weren't sure if they ever would marry.  Because of my faith and my experiences before this...I really thought I'd probably reject my child if they'd ever had sex outside of marriage or even worse...came up pregnant.  How naive I was.  This was my son, and we were going to support him and her through this no matter what it took.  That got a lot of different responses from the church people.  Mostly I think they just wished I wouldn't be so open and excited about it.  But this was a baby!  My first grandchild.  How he came into the world didn't change the fact that he was indeed coming into this world.  And he needed to be loved.  He needed a two parent, intact family.  And this became our mission.  And now....14 years later...he is in a loving, stable, two-parent, intact family.  A lot of the credit goes to J and A....but I think that G and I had a lot to do with that....and of course I don't think any of us would be here if we hadn't trusted the Lord with our feelings, our decisions and our responses to our children.  Lord, THANK YOU for the gift of C.  I love being his Nana and I wouldn't have wanted this journey to turn out any other way!  THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!

My own worst enemy sometimes....

Today in my nutrition class we discussed emotional eating.  And then I immediately went to Albertsons and bought mac and cheese, 4 cheese pasta and m&m's.  I also bought tomatos, bananas, carrots.  So far I've eaten one banana, a handful of m&m's and all of the mac and cheese...all because I am home alone and can get away with it.  I am not angry, not upset, not lonely, not bored, not stressed.  So then, why do I undermine my own self?  I am working my butt off at the gym and eating really good during the week...but come Friday I blow it.  I am doomed.

As of the 8th

I lost another 4.5 inches....and a whole 1 pound of pure fat.  But the scale hasn't moved and she is attributing it to putting on lean muscle mass....we'll see.  Trying not to be discouraged.

I want a new house....

I really, REALLY want a new house.  I want a huge family room with a fireplace where we can all fit at the same time.  I want a huge dining room that we can all fit around the table for family dinners and holiday celebrations.  I want a beautiful room for my scrapbook room.  I want an office with real cabinets, desks and lots and lots of storage.  I want an extra room to turn into an exercise room.  I want a guestroom and a playroom.  I want a laundry room that is it's own destination not a walk through.  And it would be wonderful if that laundry room had places to hang damp clothes and a sink.  I want a huge walk in shower in our new master bedroom.  I want a big backyard with a pool, deck, dog run and grass.  I want a 3 car garage.  I want there to be a shop at the back of the property for all my husband's tools and a place for him to build, create and also maintain our trucks. 

I'm sure by now you noticed that these are things that "I want."  Notice that I haven't mentioned what G wants.  He wants to retire.  He wants to be financially set for life.  He wants to be sensible.  He wants to be open and reasonable.  He wants to give me everthing I want and more.  He wants me to be happy.  And if happiness means all of the above...he'll do it.  But... at what cost? 

Lord, I am praying that you make me content with what I have.  Help me to be smart about this.  If this new house search is from You, then find us a house that meets everything I need and want in a way that won't compromise what Gary needs, too.  Most of all Lord, help me to be true to my own purpose...to love those who You have placed in my life...to put their needs and wants above my own.  Thank you Father!

New Journey of Friendship

On Tuesday I began a journey with a friend that will be long and hard.  I pray that it will also be rewarding, joyous and ultimately have a happy ending.  I am committed to this journey even though I understand that it may take more emotional energy and spiritual reserves than I have ever used before in a friendship.  G is on this journey with me.  It is time to save a life.  I will not lose another friendship to circumstance or indifference.  If you read this...just please pray for G and I....we are going to need the wisdom, patience and love that comes from God in massive doses over the next few weeks and months.