Today is the last day of 2010.  We lost my father in law and my grandmother this year.  We welcomed our 9th grandchild by adoption and our 10th grandchild by birth. 

The new year will bring our 11th grandchild; our son and 3 grandboys home and at least one wedding.  We anticipate our Lake Tahoe trip, camping in Yosemite, wedding in Las Vegas and our once-in-a-lifetime Alaskan Cruise. 

I also hope it finds us in a new church home.  Walking closer with my Jesus and growing in my knowledge of Him. 

Goals:

New church home
Renewed walk with Jesus
Cementing friendships that will last a lifetime
Grow even closer to my family and my grandchildren
Be someone that can be depended on
Lose weight and be committed to my getting heathier.

Happy 2011!  Can't wait to see what it brings!

The week after....

Christmas Eve....the smell of bacon and coffee.  The beautiful faces of my children along with their children come through the door in waves.  Pancakes, egg casserole (with a missing ingredient - just not the same).  Anxious faces wanting to know "When?  When?"  The answer of course always the same, "Not until everyone is here and has eaten their breakfast."  The tree is trimmed to perfection.  The decorations are whimsical and arranged just so.  The gingerbread village created only days before is now snuggled between snow white tissue paper and the centerpiece of our table.  My heart is full of love, laughter and contentment.  We pick a "Santa Claus" the one who will take the gifts from under the tree and hand them out.  C doesn't want the job so it goes to E.  But, I don't think that KS or A understood the honor that had been bestowed on E and made for quite a comical and sometimes frustrating parade of gifts handed out.  I tried valiantly to get a picture of each person while they opened each gift...failing...not miserably...but yet knowing that some of the gifts weren't captured for posterity.  The joy...the "thank yous" that ring out over and over...the noise of gifts being played with all rise to a crescendo that lets me know that this was indeed a well done Christmas.  All the hard work, time and effort made for a perfect day.

But....now as they days have come and gone...I realize that there was no reference of any kind to this being a celebration of Jesus' birth.  Yes, there are nativities, praying Santas and books out that tell the truth of this day, this event, this moment.  But did I ever even mention His name?  Did we even stop and acknowledge His blessing on our food?  Did I even whisper "Happy Birthday, Jesus!" to myself?  The answer to all of these questions is, shamefully, no. 

Jesus was born in the filth and stench of a stable.  He was wrapped in rags.  He was hunted down by the King and had to flee for His life.  He came and experienced life - real, visceral and probably sometimes unending misery.  He came to die.  I was born to live.  That is the gift.  Because before His sacrifice....we were all dead.  Because He took my place....died because of my sin....not His own, because He didn't have any....I was reborn.  I live.  I laugh.  I love.  I celebrate.

I forget.

My own private Christmas Party

This year I decided to do something fun/crafty with my grandkids during their Christmas vacation.  I've never actually planned time to spend time with them....I just let it happen.  This year I bought several different Gingerbread House kits, a village, a large house, and a train.  A brought another large house that she had purchased.  So we had plenty of projects to go around.  I got so caught up in trying to make these buildings stick together that I forgot to take pictures, at first.  I did get photos of all the kids working on the houses except S.  I got him working on my second project, a reindeer made out of candy canes, yarn, ribbon and googly eyes.  I saw this project in a magazine and it looked easy and cute.  But I lost where the article was so I had to make them from memory.  They turned out cute....but not really like I remember the picture.  Oh well, the kids had fun and that's all that mattered.  We made some wonderful memories and I will always treasure that. 

Oh and by the way....Gingerbread Houses are HARD!  They are also terribly messy and the frosting stuff that they include in the package was basically worthless.  I used canned frosting and had to keep putting the houses into the refridgerator to harden the icing.  Now they are all sitting on the dining room table and one has collapsed completely and the other half it's roof has slid to the ground.  After a trip to the grocery store to replenish my icing supply...I will attempt repairs.  I think next year I will come up with a new project...but will ask the kids if they want to do it again.  If they love the tradition...then we'll just keep on doing it!

One tradition that we had for many years was when A, L and I would bake Christmas cookies together every year.  It was about a week long process of searching the internet for new recipies and making a list of all the new ingredients we would need.  I would purchase all of said ingredients and we would take a whole afternoon/evening and mix, bake and decorate to our heart content.  Most of the cookies were destined for our annual church cookie exchange.  Those memories are sweet and I will always treasure them.  But now that L isn't part of our family traditions anymore...baking cookies just doesn't seem like something I want to do....yet.

I want to make sure that we are making memories.  Creating family.  Building strong relationships that will stand the test of time and give strength to them as they venture out into this big bad world.  Family....however it's put together....that's what matters.

Speaking of family...there was a Father who sacrificed his only Son.  He chose me.  He sent His Son to become a part of us.  To live with us, to become human.  To know us.  To save us.  His birth we celebrate this Saturday...that was the beginning...but this we must remember...He was born to die.  In my place.

Thank You!

It's a New World

So....I go from not knowing anything about Meth and drug addiction to an education in the last few months that I never thought I'd have to know.  Yes, I've know about the drug use of all of  my children...even going with their Dad to a crack house years ago to drag one of them out of it.  But...thankfully....it always seemed to be a phase...they all seemed to decide that isn't what they wanted and appeared to not have any problem turning their back on it.  It was probably much harder and I'm sure that I am probably unaware of many things that they did and went through.  Anyhow...where am I going with this?

Prodigal Son has admitted to a long term use of Meth and became a middle man for drug dealers in order to get free drugs.  What a scary world and my mind boggles at what my grandkids must have been going thru while said son and his now ex-wife, were off in their fairyland of drug induced irresponsibility.  He says he's been clean for 3 months.  Now his old "friends" have invaded his home and his safety.  Now he's involved in investigations, stings and undercover work.  Now I am afraid. 

Lord, please protect this child, his children and those he loves.  I am here....he is there...only You can have eyes on him....and only You can protect him.  Please allow him to come home, soon!

1 Corinthians 13 For Women

If I live in a house that is spotless, perfectly in order,

and people are not free to LIVE

because my home is more important than my family

I have not love,

I have kept a house

I have not made a home.

If I spend an exorbitant amount of money on decorations

and care more about the appearance of my house

than the atmosphere of my home

I have not love,

and my children learn materialism, not godliness.

If I control my husband

responding in irritation to him,

finding only fault in him

and not seeking to build him up,

I have not love,

and my children learn to disrespect their father,

not to honor him.

Love is patient - seeking to avoid conflict

Love it kind - seeking to be a blessing.

Love lays aside it's "rights" to serve.

Love sees the comfort of another as more important than its own.

Love continually looks for ways to build up,

Love is not critical, demanding or self seeking.

Love accepts the role that God has given

and sees it as a privilege, not a put down.

Love studies how to fulfill that role

in the most God glorifying way it can.

Before I was an adult I thought life revolved around me.

Then I took on the responsibilities of marriage.

Now I see that life revolves around others

and God's glory!

All the expectations I had for my marriage

and my life

must fade away into insignificance.

What should remain is the gospel!

The gospel reminds me of how full of grace and mercy God has been,

how full of grace and mercy I need to be,

and that I need to offer up my life

as a living sacrifice.

Now there abides in my home a husband and children,

and I am called to point them to Jesus

in all that I do,

I could seek to have my own way and my own comfort,

But the greatest thing of all

The most important thing

is love...

The love of God that I show them each day

a love the I am unable to show

unless He loves THROUGH me!

On This Post I discussed my broken relationships.  I prayed that my prodigal son would someday want to return to his family.  Well....God is in the process of answering that praying in a mighty way!  He is moving home.  It is going to be complicated and probably a very difficult adjustment....but we are moving forward not backwards and that is a plus.  My heart is so excited to know that my 3 grandsons will be close to me and I can participate in their everyday life.  Thank you God for answered prayers!!!!!

For A and KS

Legacy of an Adopted Child


Once there were two women, who had not met each other.
One you sweetly remember, the other you call mother.


Two different lives, shaped to make yours one.
One became your guiding star; the other became your sun.


The first gave you life and the second taught you to live it.
The first gave you a need for love, and the second was there to give it.


One gave you a nationality; the other gave you a name.
One gave you seeds of talent; the other gave you an aim.


One gave you emotions; the other calmed your fears.
One saw your first sweet smile, the other dried your tears.


One placed you, which was all that she could do.
The other prayed for a child and God led her straight to you.


And now you ask me, through your fears,
the age old question unanswered throughout the years...


Heredity or environment, which are you the product of?
Neither, my darling neither. Just two different kinds of love.

*Author Unknown*